I am not a church member. Can I still have my wedding at First Meridian Heights?

While formal membership is not required to get married at First Meridian Heights, we encourage you to come to church here and try it out as your home church. If you are an active member of another local congregation, however, we will ask you to be married at that location. While we perform weddings for non-members, we are not a wedding chapel. The number of weddings we do does not allow us to lend out the sanctuary to other churches and their pastors.

My fiancé and I come from different church backgrounds. Can we still have our wedding at your church?

Many couples face this issue today. We do many weddings in which the bride and groom come from different church backgrounds, even different faiths. That is another reason why we don’t require formal membership to marry here. Our pastors will discuss it with you.

Do both my fiancé and I have to speak to the minister?

This one is easy. Yes, you do and you must do so together.

What kinds of questions might the pastor ask us?

The minister who performs your wedding will meet with you as a couple. Do not get nervous about this meeting. The pastors seek to make sure that you, as a couple, have considered your feelings about the major issues confronting two people in a married relationship. There are no right or wrong answers. Here are some issues to discuss together before meeting with the Pastor:

1. Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?
2. Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?
3. Have we discussed our expectations for how the household will be maintained, and are we in agreement on who will manage the chores?
4. Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?
5. Is my partner affectionate to the degree that I expect?
6. Can we comfortably and openly discuss our sexual needs, preferences and fears?
7. Will there be a television in the bedroom?
8. Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints?
9. Have we reached a clear understanding of each other’s spiritual beliefs and needs, and have we discussed when and how our children will be exposed to religious/moral education?
10. Do we like and respect each other’s friends?
11. Do we value and respect each other’s parents, and is either of us concerned about whether the parents will interfere with the relationship?
12. What does my family do that annoys you?
13. Are there some things that you and I are NOT prepared to give up in the marriage?
14. If one of us were to be offered a career opportunity in a location far from the other’s family, are we prepared to move?
15. Does each of us feel fully confident in the other’s commitment to the marriage and believe that the bond can survive whatever challenges we may face?
16. What are our expectations for the ceremony itself?

What makes a marriage Christian?

Legal marriage contracts do not require a minister’s blessing. By choosing to be married in a Christian church, specifically at First Meridian Heights, you are acknowledging that Jesus Christ plays a role in your relationship. Services of marriage are an important part of the Christian ministry of this congregation. Appreciating how faith affects your marriage takes a lifetime.

Can a minister from a former home church assist in the service?

On limited occasions, other pastors are a part of the ceremony. You can discuss this with the pastor during your time together.

What guidelines exist for the photographer and the videographer? What kinds of decorations are allowed in the church?

Our wedding coordinators will help with these questions and many others you will ask.

What about the rehearsal?

The church wedding coordinator will conduct the rehearsal of the service. Usually, the rehearsal is held on the evening before the wedding.

Can I bring my own organist in for the wedding?

Ordinarily, the church’s organists, who come from the graduate program at Indiana University’s world-renowned School of Music, play for weddings. The wedding coordinator will discuss music, including any special music you might be considering, and will explain all procedures, deadlines, and extra costs, if any.